The Harmonious We

This article was written by Dr. David Zuniga, an ordained Zen priest,

writer and post-doctoral fellow in clinical psychology

“When a group of individuals becomes a ‘we,’ a harmonious whole, they have reached as high as humans can reach.” — Albert Einstein

Despite our cultural diversity, we all search for meaning in life. We want to know that our lives matter. We all face difficulties and seek ways to transform that experience. And yet, the systems we use to give us meaning, such as religion and spirituality, all too often cause conflict and create division instead of uniting us in our shared human condition.

Researchers who study group behavior and conflict resolution observe that superordinate goals can be a practical way to overcome prejudice and acrimony. Superordinate goals require working together towards a shared objective. In this way, individuals and groups who have traditionally been in opposition to each other find ways to work together and overcome differences.

Social psychologists suggest other ways to help reduce prejudice, such as increasing contact through equal-status interactions and working together to overcome a common adversary. What if collaboration was the norm and different spiritual traditions came together to combat common problems such as homelessness, domestic violence, or lack of access to quality medical care? All the world religions and philosophies have their unique insights and practices. It’s exciting to consider what could be done both globally and locally if people from diverse traditions acted in concert to overcome systemic problems.

In my previous work as an interfaith chaplain in healthcare I experienced firsthand some of the challenges and opportunities of working in a pluralistic setting. I never cease to be amazed at how people with diverse beliefs can draw upon the wellspring of their traditions to endure and transform what otherwise might be unendurable. Certainly there is a joy to being in community with others who hold the same beliefs. But it’s also enriching when we step outside our comfort zone and are exposed to different views and ways of coping. Only associating with like-minded individuals presents the temptation of succumbing to groupthink. It can be easy for cohesive groups to value unanimity to such a degree that they suspend critical thinking. Through my psychology practice I have gleaned similar insights.

When we are exposed to the rich tapestry of human experience it can help us discover new things in ourselves. Being raised Christian made me a better Buddhist. Spirituality contributes to my path in becoming a psychologist. Each difficulty or stage of our path can lead to eventual transformation. I remember a conversation with a man who was Roman Catholic and wore a scapular as a special devotion to the Virgin Mary. He had a very aggressive form of cancer. His faith in the prayers he said in conjunction with wearing his scapular moved me beyond words.

We do not have scapulars in Zen. I wear a Buddhist mala as a reminder to cultivate mindfulness and compassion. I seek to turn my life into a living, loving form of meditation. The devotion of this man with his scapular inspires me in my own practice of wearing a mala. When we sit compassionately and are fully present to someone else who is suffering we can both be healed in the process. Through both spirituality and psychology I have come to see how we often find our highest form of happiness by stepping outside the bounds of ourselves and our own beliefs and selflessly serving someone else. We all save each other.